Why did the fan bring a snow shovel to the Grey Cup game?
To find the goal line—and their seat!
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Funny Business: Now it’s a Ford Focus
I just dumped some Adderall into my Ford Fiesta’s gas tank. Now it’s a Ford Focus.
Funny Business: Jokes for Easter
How do you know that carrots are good for your eyes? Have you ever seen a rabbit wear glasses?
Funny Business: A Frayed Knot
A piece of string walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender tells him, “Sorry, we don’t serve strings here. Get out.” The string walks out and unravels one end of himself…
Funny Business: Jokes of the Irish
Why did the leprechaun buy a trampoline? Because he heard March was spring time.
Funny Business: A Rome Ants Novel
I’ve been reading a book about two insects who fell in love in Italy. It’s a Rome ants novel.
Funny Business: Why Can’t You Come Into Work Today?
When I got up this morning I took two Ex-Lax in addition to my Prozac. I can’t get off the john, but I feel good about it.
Funny Business: A Lighter Fluid
What weighs more, a gallon of water or a gallon of butane? The gallon of water. Butane is a lighter fluid.
Funny Business: I’m on the phone
“I was in my car driving back from work. A police officer pulled me over and knocked on my window. I said, ‘One minute, I’m on the phone.’”
Funny Business: Valentine's Day Jokes
How do vampires know if they had a successful Valentine’s Day? If it’s love at first bite.
Funny Business: Jokes from the Animal Kingdom
Why are giraffes so slow to apologize? It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.