What do Santa’s helpers learn in school?
The elf-abet!
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Dog Plays Chess, Boy Swallows Ships
The doctor finds an aircraft carrier and two smaller boats in the kids intestines.
These jokes are for the birds...
A proper tweetment is the only solution for a sick bird’s speedy recovery.
You know you’re a Hockey Mom when ...
In Spring and Summer, you are a graceful woman of class, and then hockey season starts.
Psychic Hotline Frog
One day this frog was bored, so he decided to call the psychic hotline. The psychic asked the frog “what do you want to know?”
Things Not to Say on Your Valentine's Date
I never said you NEED a nose job. I just said it wouldn't hurt to consider it.
Did someone say, COFFEE?
“If it wasn’t for the coffee, I’d have no identifiable personality whatsoever.” – David Letterman
The Tradition of the Angel on top of the Christmas Tree
When four of Santa’s elves got sick, the trainee elves did not produce toys as fast as the regular ones, and Santa began to feel the pre-Christmas pressure.
