Funny Business: Coffee Jokes

• I like my coffee the way I like my mornings — dark, strong, and capable of convincing me not to go back to bed.

• Some people run on ambition. I run on caffeine and spite, and frankly, both seem to be working.

• Behind every successful person is substantial amount of coffee.

• OVERHEARD at the BEAN. The jokes are fresh. The coffee’s fresher.

• Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged.

• What do you call a sad cup of coffee? A depresso.

• My doctor told me to cut back on caffeine, so I switched to a smaller mug and lied about it. We’ve been very happy together ever since.

• Why was the coffee bean so good at gossip? It always had the latest grounds.

• Life happens. Coffee helps.